Things That Piss Me Off (an angry rant)

I hate being late for things.   I cringe at the thought of making up a story for the host so that we can have an excuse for our tardiness.  Everyone knows I'm a terrible liar.  What I hate more than being late is people who are supposed to meet me and are late.  Please, call me, tell me your crazy why I was late lies and lets get on about our days.  I can't stand to sit and stew and wait for you.  Lateness pisses me off.


When we are sitting in a crowded restaurant and I can hear your lips smacking, your food crunching, and mad soup slurping sounds from across the table, we have a problem.  Even more than that, if you try and talk to me with food spewing forth from your mouth, I will stop you.  I will ask you to finish your mouthful, and then speak to me.  When your mouth is so full that corn is dribbling down your face while you try and babble, we have a problem.  When we are at a fancy wedding or other upscale venue and you finish your food and drink and then proceed to belch loudly and giggle like children, you are offensive.  I will be embarrassed to be seated with you.  Cover your mouth and behave civilly.   If you can not behave with proper table manners when in public, we have a problem.  Eating noises, talking with your mouth full, and poor table manners piss me off.


If you do not get along with other adults, that is fine.  We can't possibly all like each other.  When you take this dislike out in a public forum it is in bad taste.  I do not want to read it (ok maybe I do, I love the gossip.)  I do not want to be stuck in the middle of it.  Can't you see the damage that you're doing to yourself and the people around you?  Childish adults piss me off.


We've all at some point opened up the refrigerator and been taken aback by the foul stench emanating from within.  No matter how many times you've searched and searched you still can't find the stinky offender.  Only days later do you realize it's that bag of mushy goo stuffed in the back corner.  What on earth was that?  How did it get back there?  Why does it smell so bad?  Rotten things in the back of the fridge piss me off.

I'll be updating and adding more things that piss me off as I think about them.  Tomorrow instead of being pissed off, I'm going to start a "things that make me happy" blog.